Chapter 79: The Heavenly Demon Cult Serial Murder Case: A Night of Murder Without a Culprit

They served dog food and called it fried rice.

In Qing’s understanding of reality, fried rice was rice that had been stir-fried.

That meant fried rice should never have broth in it.

But apparently, the head cook of Bliss Palace didn’t share that belief.

Qing, who took food very seriously, was furious.

How the hell…

How the fuck…

How could this dog food be called fried rice?!

This was an abomination that had no place in the world!

A crime against cuisine itself.

Such a monstrosity should be erased from existence.

And so, Qing did exactly that.

She put maximum effort into getting rid of it.

“Junior Sister Xi!? How—how the hell did you manage to eat five bowls of that!? Are your taste buds broken too, not just your leg!?”

Gyeon Pohee gawked at her in disbelief.

Qing gave her a deeply wounded look.

“You wouldn’t understand, Senior Sister. You grew up sheltered, never knowing struggle. After everything I’ve been through, even this disgusting excuse for fried rice—no, wait. Who am I kidding? It’s just fucking disgusting.”

Qing had devoured five bowls.

“This is just cruel. Why do I have to suffer like this even when I eat…”

Her eyes glossed over.

She had too many grievances tied to food.

Seeing that expression, Gyeon Pohee spoke up.

“Cheer up! Ah! Junior Sister, how about we eat out for dinner?”

Wait.

Why the hell was she glowing all of a sudden?

Qing’s eyes lit up.

“Really? We can do that?”

“Yeah! From the Fifth Seat of the Second Generation onwards, we’re allowed to eat outside.”

Gyeon Pohee had eaten her way up the ranks by taking down a senior disciple.

“But, Senior Sister… you’re broke.”

Yesterday, Qing had gone out scouting, hoping to buy a snack.

But she was completely broke after losing Moonlight Sword (No. 8) and Bokshinjeok.

Unfortunately, Gyeon Pohee was also flat broke.

Which meant they had just sat there miserably, sucking on their fingers.

Did she suddenly come into money today?

Gyeon Pohee answered confidently.

“We can earn some during afternoon training.”

Qing tilted her head.

“…Training gives you money? Then why the hell haven’t I gotten any?”

“Oh, right. Junior Sister, you’re from the Central Plains, so you wouldn’t know! Here in Bliss Palace, we can earn pocket money while we train! That’s actually why I joined!”

“Wait, hold on! You’re telling me Bliss Palace has such a progressive system?”

Qing had assumed Bliss Palace was just a complete mess.

But was this the reason the disciples put up with it?

Qing thought back to her miserable training years.

If she had gotten paid for training, she would’ve been a damn millionaire by now.

Then Gyeon Pohee added:

“You’ve got huge tits and a pretty face, so if you hang up a red lantern, you’ll attract tons of customers! Even if guys pretend not to care, they always go for the big ones.”

Qing blinked.

Something sounded very wrong.

Big tits. Beauty. Red lantern. Customers. Popularity. Men.

If you connected the dots…

This was starting to sound an awful lot like—

“…Stop right there. I have a very bad feeling about this. I don’t think I should hear the rest.”

“Hah, I get it! You’re a martial artist, after all! Just draining a bit of internal qi wouldn’t be satisfying for you, huh? If you wanted to, you could just grab men off the street and drain them completely. I’m so jealous…”

Bitch, I literally just told you to stop talking.

Qing’s brain clicked.

She had heard rumors before.

That seducing men wasn’t worth it because the senior disciples would take everything.

So that’s what it meant.

She had already witnessed women getting drained.

It was… a very direct and powerful process.

If they could do that to women, why wouldn’t they do the same to men?

Qing gulped and asked cautiously.

“Can I… watch a training session?”

“Nope. The guys are surprisingly shy. If they see someone watching, they won’t come in.”

Ah. That didn’t work…

Qing quickly changed tactics.

“Then, if I bring you a man, can I watch the ‘finishing’ part from the side?”

“What!? For real!? Of course! Hehehe…”

Oh hell yes—front-row VIP seating!

A private performance!

Qing was giddy with anticipation.

Should she prepare some popcorn in advance?

Or maybe grab some chilled Longjing tea to sip while watching?

Kyaa~!

She’d ask Seol Ganom about it later tonight.

A strong, stamina-packed bastard—that’s what she needed a recommendation for.

Honestly, she had thought Seol Ganom’s name was ridiculous at first.

But now?

Now it rolled off the tongue perfectly.

There was something oddly endearing about it.

Maybe… maybe it was actually a great name?

His rationality and insight were practically above the level of the Heavenly Demon Divine Cult.

Well, technically, he was in the cult but not really part of it.

Anyway, she should ask him—if he could learn one martial art, what would he choose?

Might as well gather multiple opinions before spending her next 2,000 karma points.

Qing tilted her head and looked up at Crutch No. 2, who was carrying her back to her room.

Hmm.

Yeah, she didn’t need to ask this one.

“Junior Sister! Get some rest, okay?”

Crutch No. 2 cheerfully waved after placing her on the bed before heading off to training.

Lying on the bed, Qing thought.

What should I do now? Should I train?

…But she was too full.

She rubbed her bloated belly, round and tight with food.

Thinking about it, she had to go out tonight, so she should squeeze in some sleep now.

What if she got tired and sloppy during her nighttime activities?

No way.

She had to force herself to sleep.

“Haaaah…”

Qing let out a deep yawn and closed her eyes.

There was a unique bliss in lying down after eating.

But she had to lie on her left side.

Lying on the right made her stomach feel uncomfortable.

So she settled in, muscles relaxing, mind drifting into hazy drowsiness…

—BANG BANG BANG!

Who the hell was pounding on the door in broad daylight?

—BANG BANG BANG BANG. Ximen Qing!

I don’t care. Ximen Qing is asleep. Try again later.

—BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG! Ximen Qing! I know you’re inside!

“…For fuck’s sake.”

Qing bolted upright.

“It’s not locked, just come in!”

The door swung open, and a stranger stepped inside.

A gaunt middle-aged woman, practically the manifestation of every strict schoolteacher in classic literature.

Despite her gaunt, bony face, malice seeped from her expression.

Behind her stood a maid.

The woman clicked her tongue at Qing.

“Tsk, tsk. A woman lying down right after lunch. Didn’t your parents ever tell you that would turn you into an ox?”

“…Are you disrespecting oxen right now? Oxen are my friends.”

“Hah. Looking at those filthy udders of yours, you’re already halfway to being a breeding cow. How could the Supreme ever accept such a disgraceful wench…?”

Qing’s expression darkened.

Seriously.

Why the fuck were people so obsessed with her chest?

Did they think she liked them?

They were heavy, sweaty, blocked her vision, got in the way of her sword swings, hurt no matter which way she slept, and if she leaked, it got all over her clothes.

There wasn’t a single goddamn benefit.

“What the hell is this? You here to pick a fight? You wanna throw down?”

Qing raised her fist.

The woman shook her head.

“I am your instructor in etiquette from now on. You will address me as Madam Kang. The people of the Central Plains once called me ‘The Heavenly Beauty of Music.’”

“…? Beauty? Are you sure it wasn’t ‘Heavenly Witch’?”

Madam Kang’s face twisted.

But Qing stood her ground.

If they didn’t want to be cursed at, they shouldn’t have racked up so much bad karma.

“Bow! Will you not show respect to your teacher?”

“Teacher? I never signed up for this class.”

“Enough. Here—take this.”

At Madam Kang’s signal, the maid approached, carrying a large bundle, which she placed on the bed.

Qing unwrapped the cloth, revealing a neatly stacked pile of books.

“…What’s this? A book delivery?”

“There are nine martial arts techniques and one music score among them. You will learn the martial arts on your own, and I will instruct you in etiquette and music.”

A whole bundle of Immortal Fairy Arts, bestowed upon her by the Alleged Supreme.

Well—martial arts themselves weren’t evil.

Qing’s eyes lit up.

“Martial arts? What’s the occasion?”

She casually flipped through the manuals.

The Martial Arts Window registered eight techniques.

One book was a fake, apparently.

Whatever.

It was free, so no complaints.

…But the quality was absolute garbage.

Five white-bordered, two blue-bordered, and one red-bordered technique.

White, blue, red, gold, purple.

If she translated this into modern gambling terminology, that was N, R, SR, SSR, UR.

Clearly, the first two tiers were just filler.

White and blue techniques capped out at 10 stars, gave barely any stat points, and were practically useless.

Compared to red-tier or higher, which granted huge stat boosts at 12 stars, they were barely worth collecting.

On the plus side, they required almost no training time.

Especially white-tier techniques—she could max them out instantly as soon as she got them.

She had been doing that all along.

At least there was one red technique.

Lustful Fairy Disrobing Dance.

Qing’s brow furrowed.

…Disrobing?

Was this seriously a striptease technique?

No way.

Amazingly, her guess was mostly correct.

If she had to score it, it was about 80 points accurate.

Disrobing was indeed undressing, but the last character (舞, dance) confirmed it—it was a dance martial art.

The name Tangxian[^from "Lustful Fairy". Originally translated as Tangxian Disrobing Dance] referred to an "Indulgent Immortal", an old euphemism for a depraved seductress.

It was also the nickname of Daji, one of history’s most infamous femme fatales—hailed as the greatest wicked woman of all time.

Daji was a flawless beauty, so stunning that she spent her days gazing longingly at the sky, her eyes filled with sorrow.

Daji had once been a celestial maiden, but due to her innate evil, she was cast down from the heavens.

Her longing gaze was simply her yearning for the home she could never return to.

The King Zhou of Shang, feeling pity for her, did everything in his power to ease her suffering.

One day, Daji witnessed someone die.

And then, for the first time… she smiled.

Shocked, the King observed closely.

The more gruesome and agonizing the death, the brighter Daji’s smile became.

And so—

To preserve her smile, the King of Shang devised the most creative methods of torture and execution, all for her amusement.

It was a tragic love story, so beautiful it was recorded in history.

Eventually, Daji was so moved by the King’s devotion that—

By the time blood filled entire lakes, she began stripping off her clothes, dancing seductively for the King, and gifting him wild nights of passion.

Thus, the Lustful Fairy Undressing Dance was inspired by that very imagery.

Qing stared blankly at the book.

So that kind of undressing, huh.

And what the hell was she supposed to do with this?

…Should she have Crutch No. 2 learn it instead?

Qing was lost in thought when—

“Focus! Your teacher is not a person with time to waste. We will begin your lessons immediately. Take this.”

Madam Kang threw something long and heavy toward her.

Qing instinctively caught it.

The cold, weighty sensation…

The unmistakable chill of Cold Iron.

Qing’s eyes widened.

“My Ten-Thousand Gold! You’re back!”