Chapter 25: Ximen Qing

A lightning bolt crashed down from the sky, splitting the air with a thunderous crack. "What in the bloody hell is going on in that thick skull of yours?! You don't even know your own teacher's family name?! Even an idiot dimwit like you, this is ridiculous!"

"Oh, so it wasn't Xi...?"

"It's Ximen, you daft twit. Honestly..."

"Ah."

A-Qing felt a bit wronged. She'd seen people with five-character names in Murim. And no one told her if it was "Xi" or "Xi-men."

"Qing. My dear disciple."

"Ah, that's... way better, I think."

"Qing" was definitely an upgrade from "A-Qing." I mean, "A-Qing" sounds like a freaking Pokémon or something.

"Now, about your name. I must pass on a crucial martial art to you."

"“Oh! Ah—” Qing almost blurted out her old catchphrase but quickly corrected herself. Too late.

THWAK! A noogie from hell landed on her head.

"Such uncouth language... I shall teach you the 'Heavenly Love's Heart Technique,' a cultivation technique. It's a core technique of our sect, so it shouldn't be too hard for you to pick up."

"Heavenly Love's Heart Technique..."

"Mastering it will bring you the greatest achievement imaginable."

Qing gulped, her mind buzzing with anticipation. The name alone sounded awesome, and if the top expert in the world was personally teaching it to her, it had to be something special.

"What kind of achievement are we talking about here?"

Ximen Surin answered, ""You'll become prettier."

"... What?"

"It cultivates beauty."

"Oh... that's it?"

THWAK! Another noogie.

Qing clutched her head, tears welling up in her eyes. This was some bullshit.

"The best way for a woman to conceal herself is to become so beautiful that she's beyond suspicion. Now, listen carefully, for I shall impart the secrets of the Heavenly Love's Heart Technique..."

Ximen Surin chanted the verses. Qing strained to focus, but a thought nagged her. Can I even learn this the normal martial arts way?

Well, if it didn't work, she could always ask to see the manual or have it written down. But then...

But to her surprise, as soon as Ximen Surin finished chanting, the status window popped up again. A new entry had appeared in the martial arts section: a blue-bordered internal energy cultivation technique.

'That's it? A blue technique?' Qing thought, a flicker of disappointment crossing her mind.

Hirkk. Suddenly, the text of the Heavenly Love's Heart Technique flooded her mind, a torrent of words and concepts.

"Have you memorized everything?" Ximen Surin asked.

"Yes, Master," Qing replied.

"Everything? In one go?"

Ximen Surin was astonished. Had this seemingly clueless girl suddenly become a genius?

"Can you recite it?"

"Sure. Since ancient times, the most precious gift has been a bright face, loved without effort. This is beauty. The Yan Emperor had many children, among them a daughter who cultivated virtue through beauty..."

A-Qing spouted the verses. It was blatant cheating. But Ximen Surin, unaware, nodded in satisfaction.

This baby's talent must all be focused on martial arts. That explained how a toddler who should still be crawling was already at the peak of the late stage.

"Now, I shall guide your energy. Turn around."

Energy guidance allowed a student to directly experience the proper circulation of energy. Half the reason why teachers were loved was because of this. Even the biggest dunce wouldn't forget something they'd felt in their own body.

Energy flowed freely within her. A strange yet amazing sensation. A gentle current from her dantian, circulating through her body before returning.

Once again, the status window appeared, announcing that she had reached the first stage of the Heavenly Love's Heart Technique. Qing might have cursed the status window, but she was grateful for the free training points it provided.

"Try circulating your energy now. Excellent! You learn quickly. You're a remarkable student."

"She's truly worthy of being the next top expert in the world," Ximen Surin thought. "It's time for a woman to claim that title. After all, martial arts belong to women.

The way of channeling nature's energy and controlling it all originated from the Nine Heavenly Goddess. When she descended to the mortal world, she hid her true form and introduced herself as an ordinary woman. People called her the Woman of Yue, or simply Yue Maiden.

Yue Maiden loved wearing blue clothes, so she was also called A-Qing. And that connection led to this moment.

"Her talent is undeniable. Now, I must teach her the proper conduct of a female expert. How do I turn this wild little thing into a proper lady?"

High on praise, Qing grinned. If she knew what Ximen Surin was thinking, she wouldn't be smiling.

"Now, let's learn how to manage your hair."

"Manage my hair?"

"Yes."

"What kind of training is that?"

"It's exactly as it sounds: the art of managing a woman's hair, which is as precious as her life."

"... What?"

Qing blinked. Why the sudden focus on hairstyles?

Ignoring her confusion, Ximen Surin continued, "I shall teach you forty-two ways to tie your hair. You must memorize them all and perform them flawlessly."

"Um, does tying hair help with martial arts?"

"You're so focused on fighting," Ximen Surin said with a hint of disapproval. "You're already a top female expert, but the world judges female martial artists harshly."

If a female martial artist is weak, people scoff and say, "What's a weak woman doing trying to fight?" But if she's strong, they'll find something else to criticize.

If she's not beautiful, they'll say, "Well, she's ugly, so she has to be good at martial arts to compensate." But if she is beautiful, they'll whisper, "She must have slept her way to the top."

Even when a male martial artist beheads his enemies and leaves a trail of blood and gore, people praise his courage and determination. But if a woman does the same, they call her cruel and vicious.

Even simple acts of charity are twisted. If a man gives money to a beggar, he's compassionate. But if a woman does it, people say she's too soft-hearted for the harsh world of martial arts.

"Oh..." Qing sensed something was wrong.

Teacher? This sudden turn is making me feel a bit uncomfortable. You're saying some pretty messed up things.

"Therefore, as you travel the world, you must represent all female martial artists with dignity. This means not only honing your skills but also maintaining a graceful and beautiful appearance at all times."

I... represent all female martial artists?

Qing was horrified. She was the last person in the world who should be doing that.

"Um... Master..." she began, but Ximen Surin cut her off.

"Now, let's begin."

"Now, let's begin our lesson." Her voice left no room for argument.

Qing could only nod, her face a mask of despair.

I need to get the hell out of here!

ASAP!

Ximen Surin had declared that Qing's wild nature was incurable and vowed to instill proper feminine behavior through sheer repetition. She had ordered Qing to remain at the Ximen estate for six months before being allowed to leave.

Thinking six months wouldn't be too bad was her downfall.

Thus began Qing's torment.

The main culprit? Noogies.

Hair out of place? Noogie. Clothes not neat enough? Noogie. Walking too loud? Noogie. Talking too casually? Noogie. Eating like a pig? Noogie. Sitting with legs spread? Noogie.

It was like living under a dictator who believed in solving every problem with nukes.

These weren't just any noogies. One hit, and your lips involuntarily puckered. Your eyes watered, a searing pain running through your skull, making you feel like your scalp was splitting open.

The only thing keeping Qing from running away was Jin Jangmyeong.

"Unni, are you okay?"

"I think I'm dying. Like, actually dying."

"Oh no, Unni. Your poor head..." Jin Jangmyeong gently stroked Qing's hair.

"Don't touch! My hair will come undone!"

Qing quickly redid her hair. Today's count: twenty-three. Two hairpins, one ribbon. Her hands moved unconsciously, trained by five months of relentless punishment.

Jin Jangmyeong plopped down in front of her, offering her back. "Me too. Do my hair."

"Too lazy. Do it yourself."

"I'm too lazy too."

Jin Jangmyeong lay flat on her back, pressing her head against Qing's stomach.

Qing sighed, "Which style?"

"Thirty-five."

"Why does it have to be thirty-five?"

Qing grabbed Jin Jangmyeong's hair. Style thirty-five required braiding the side hair into two strands and then twisting them together. The most annoying style ever.

In just five months, Jin Jangmyeong transformed from a scrawny ten-year-old to a cute little middle schooler. It was less growing up and more evolving.

Those with rare innate energy like Jangmyeong's progressed rapidly once their dantian was formed. On top of that, she had consumed the entire essence of the Great Rejuvenation Pill.

Jin Jangmyeong's internal energy had already surpassed the late stage of the first-rate realm. With her health improving, she'd grown taller and gained weight.

But Ximen Surin said she'd missed the optimal growth period, so she wouldn't get much taller.

"It's almost time, isn't it? We should go for afternoon training."

"Yeah," Qing replied, finally finishing the intricate braid. 

Qing stepped out of her hut, the afternoon sun casting long shadows behind her.